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Steve Dont Eat It
2 hours ago
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Gary Gygax
Father of "the game" you'll be missed.
Smokey, my friend, you are entering a world of pain.
My Blog List
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A Series of D100 Sword & Sorcery Table for Profane & Terrible Lovecraftian entities Encounters Tables For Castles & Crusades Rpg - Here is a d100 random encounter and lore table tailored for a high-lethality Sword & Sorcery campaign. In classic pulp style, these entities aren't just b...
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Cyberstyle 8.5 - Three more illustrations for BLACK POLISHED CHROME, my cyberpunk RPG/setting that never was. “Sexual Prosthetic”Digital GreyscaleMay 27, 2026 The following...9 hours ago
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Language Dungeon Spitballing - I've had an idea floating around in my head for a puzzlebox dungeon (system and setting indeterminate) centered on decipherment of the dungeon-builder’s ...13 hours ago
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The Lost Tomb of Kazcuk Mot the Undying - By Greg GawronAdvanced Fantasy GamesOSRICLevels 2-4 Hidden within a long-forgotten cemetery stands an abandoned mausoleum, once a place of grand splendor a...19 hours ago
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THE STAR-CROSSED BLADES OF THE GREEN PEONY SESSION VII - This is the Seventh session of our Star-Crossed Blades of the Green Peony campaign for Wandering Heroes of Ogre Gate (session I can be found HERE, sessio...1 day ago
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The Goblin Riddle Trap - Here’s another fantastic goblin trap I will need to use. You can check out the last one I shared here.To break the flimsy bar I’d say it’s a DC 12 Strength...
1 day ago -
[Parsulan] The Durendine Heads - *Photo by Paul Glazzard* The head of Vorlas is on display in the Revolutionary Museum in Kingshead, shielded from the ravages of time by magic so that it ...
1 day ago -
[Q&A] Jack Nelson (Inheritance of Earth – Void Saga Book 1) - [7:31 PM]Jack R Nelson: My Pen Name is Jack R Nelson. I have a book out that is a planed series. Called Inheritance of Earth – Book 1 of the Void Saga. Don...2 days ago
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Satan Helps Elucidate Skywalker's Rescue Plot - To cut a long story short, I was recently on a long-haul flight and ended up watching *The Empire Strike Back *and part of *Return of the Jedi *on the in...2 days ago
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Krátká Lidová Republika: A Brief Account of the Republic of the Short Peoples - For centuries the Wee Peoples of Zěm have occupied a peculiar place within the Overking's domains. Too useful to exterminate, too numerous to ignore, a...
2 days ago -
The Doomed Yee-Haw Roundup - We've been doing group watches of Weird Westerns over on the Tales of the Grotesque and Dungeonesque Discord server. To keep it varied, I've tried to run...
3 days ago -
My One Stop How To Grapple Guide for d&d5.5/2024 - I made this as all these rules are all over the book. This came about from an elemental monk player wanting to grab a trex or...
3 days ago -
The Player's Handbook Pulse... - Dungeons & Dragons has gone through many iterations, and its cover artwork has always encapsulated the state of the hobby at any given time. But it was t...
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4 days ago -
New Rule (Cranfield, Birmingham) - New rule: check your bags. For years I've been wheeling a carry-on secure in the knowledge I can get off the plane straight away and walk out of the airp...6 days ago
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CLAWING FIEND - CLAWING FIEND "Ghastly shades of bygone gladness, Clawing fiends of future sadness." H.P. Lovecraft, *Cycle Of Verse* This one is the same but I really w...
1 week ago -
I am Dr Rotwang! - I am NOT the fella who goes by "Doktor Rotwang" on Substack. I've never met him. I'm not a Navy veteran. We are not the same guy, no matter what Google AI ...1 week ago
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Why Wandering Monsters Mattered - Wandering monsters were never just random fights. In D&D, they created pressure. They drained resources. They punished wasted time. They stopped playe...
1 week ago -
Off to North Texas Con - So everyone knows I will be at North Texas Con this week. My books and maps will be for sale at the Black Blade Publishing Booth. I am running three sand...1 week ago
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The DOOM approaches! - THE FINAL HOURS! THE COUNT-DOWN BEGINS! The Kickstarter for Doom of the Dark, the nightland adventure from Patrick Stuart (me) and Amanda Lee, is nearly o...
2 weeks ago -
In 1952’s “The Road to Bali” with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby, the island princess has strong feelings… - In 1952’s “The Road to Bali” with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby, the island princess has strong feelings for Bob Hope because he resembles her childhood frien...2 weeks ago
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Micro-Adventure - #114 RATS! - Dungeon tropes are a thing to embrace, not to dismiss. It's simple to handwave the storm the orc infested tower to save the princess, evil wizard in a t...
4 weeks ago -
Lords of Chaos! Free League also producing a Stormbringer game? - Well this is a bit confusing. Just two days ago I mentioned that Goodman Games announced that they will be producing material based upon Michael Moorcock...
5 weeks ago -
Setting a new course: 7th Sea Third Edition - There aren’t a lot of good opportunities to come out of cold storage these days. Honestly, finding time for work, family, gaming, and game prep doesn’t lea...2 months ago
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Why Open Tables Work So Well for Old-School Campaigns - *It was suggested that I turn my YouTube transcripts into blog posts. Consider this an experiment for now - Tenkar* If your campaign lives and dies by...
3 months ago -
Divine Patronage: A Separate System for Party Advancement - In the past, I've written about why parties should have their own character sheet. The party sheet can track reputation, how noisy they are in the dungeon...
3 months ago -
"I Share My Dreams with Ghosts" - Espionage Mechanics for Star Wars d6 - I've been running the Andor Game for nearly 20 sessions (19 as of this past Saturday), and I've been *really *happy with the results so far. I've been st...
3 months ago -
ignore all previous instructions - [image: UNDER THE SKIN] * We long to return, and we can, because the cosmos is within us.* *Hᴇᴀᴠᴇɴ* *was furious. So loud and discordant were these yout...
4 months ago -
Underkeep: a new game reminiscent of Dungeon master - *Underkeep* is a game which is currently in development, it is reminiscent of the old "Dungeon Master" which many of us used to play on Amiga 500 back i...4 months ago
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On a Happy New Year - We are about to experience the most social upheaval since industrialization. What will that look like in sixty years? Sinless is starting it's third yea...
5 months ago -
New Diversions of the Groovy Kind Posts Twice Monthly at Blue Moon Comics' Ko-fi Shop - New, FREE posts from Ol' Groove twice a month at Blue Moon Comics Group's Ko-fi Shop! Don't miss out!
5 months ago -
Review: Cthulhu by Gaslight, Keeper’s Guide - Review: Cthulhu by Gaslight, Keeper’s Guide As anyone who spends ten minutes in my presence knows- I love CoC and I am fascinated with 19th century Lon...5 months ago
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Fiendish Monsters: The Horror Art of Bruce Timm cover revealed! Available December 2nd on Flesk… - Fiendish Monsters: The Horror Art of Bruce Timm cover revealed! Available December 2nd on Flesk...6 months ago
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Mutants and Wizards - Heya folks, long time no see. I've just started working on something new called Mutants and Wizards. It's going to be an OSE/OSR post-apocalyptic game t...7 months ago
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Experience with Python - Well, it amused me to make it. (Inspired by my Facebook ads.) But it did get me thinking about how Conan the Barbarian set the bar so high for 1980s f...
7 months ago -
The Earwight - The sinister little insects known as earwights are thought to have once been earwigs who fed on the decaying flesh of revenants or other matter suffused wi...8 months ago
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B5 Horror on the Hill - Finished! - After what feels like an inordinate amount of time, we finally finished Adventure *B5: Horror on the Hill.* We started this one back in the fall of 2024....
9 months ago -
Trollish Delver moving - In an effort to get away from the shadow of Google this blog can now be found at www.trollish-delver.writeas.com.1 year ago
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And Now For Something Completely Different - I'm participating in another blogging challenge this month, the 31 Day Character Creation Challenge - I opted to make a classic *Traveller* character each ...1 year ago
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The Tarot of Pips - Somewhere in your dice collection is a die like this one, the humblest of dice. Although you don't know it, this small white die carries with it a secr...1 year ago
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Inspectres in Grifton - On November 8, we played a one-off Inspectres game set with the Starkweather monster hunter tradition, based in Grifton. My Setup I quickly pulled out and ...1 year ago
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FWS Ships of the Line: Explorer and Science Ships - Often one of the set pieces for high space adventure and tragedy is those spacecraft that go where no one has gone before and may never go again if the ou...
1 year ago -
More Moria - Thanks to Free League's Moria: Through the Doors of Durin sourcebook for their Lord of the Rings RPG The One Ring, we have an updated & official map, guid...1 year ago
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Profitez des offres de bonus exclusives: Découverte de l’offre de 200 tours gratuits et 75 € - Êtes-vous un amateur de jeux en ligne et à la recherche de nouvelles opportunités excitantes? Alors, préparez-vous à découvrir une offre qui va changer v...2 years ago
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Angels, Demons and Subtle Bodies - It’s delightful when D&D-isms sometimes converge with ancient wisdom, even accidentally. I was watching a video from Jonathan Pageau earlier today concerni...2 years ago
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There Were Dice - I started my Spelljammer game last weekend. It was my first time DMing since December 2021. I wasn't as rusty as I thought I was going to be, but I *was ...3 years ago
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Legends of Law: Von Hoff - Wampus Country has had its share of heroes, both in antiquity and in the modern era, but perhaps none is held up as the flower of knighthood quite as mu...3 years ago
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Notes on a semi-successful skill system - When I finished my Team Tsathogga campaign back in 2019, one of the things that I noted afterwards was the extent to which fighters had struggled to keep...3 years ago
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Trying Something New - Based on what I said last time, I’m going to try out something new. Check out my posts at Medium – one test you can ignore, one discussion of why I chose t...4 years ago
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Strange, Dangerous, and Inhuman: The Fey and Fairie - When I was a boy I loved fairy tales. Jack and the Beanstalk, Puss in Boots, Rumpelstiltskin - I devoured all of it. My fascination that there was a strang...6 years ago
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balu8: Crime Convention by Jeph Loeb and Darwyn Cooke - balu8: Crime Convention by Jeph Loeb and Darwyn Cooke6 years ago
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Discontinued - Friends, I'll make it official. I will stop this blog. A lot has happened last year. And my interests have moved in a different direction. Thank you for...6 years ago
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Ravensburg Reboot: Streamlined City Map - I mentioned in my last post how I was tweaking and reworking parts of my Ravensburg setting. Today I streamlined the city map. The old map had lots of redu...
6 years ago -
Please, I don't do paid advertisements - don't ask. - A little note since people have asked me about this. My video channel's *not* an advertising platform, so I'm not available for hire if you want to promote...7 years ago
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How can We Destroy this Campaign World? - d12 1. You must trick a bard into strumming the *Chords of Fate* on the *Lute of Annihilation* 2. Legends tell of thermonuclear weapons beneath megadunge...
7 years ago -
omercifulheaves: Red SonjaArt by Bruce Timm - omercifulheaves: Red Sonja Art by Bruce Timm7 years ago
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Goodbye and Good Luck - Well some of you may have noticed this blog has been down, restricting access for some time. For various reasons I've decided to step away from the OSR...
8 years ago -
Eurafrika Attacks! [Campaign Idea] - Around about 1929, a German architect by the name of Herman Sörgel came with an idea he called Atlantropa. The idea was simple (no, not really) - he was go...
8 years ago -
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Additional Things - Doing Away with Hitpoints - So there s a couple of things you need to adress, if you want to get rid of Hitpoints. These are not fully formed rules, this, like much of the stuff i pos...9 years ago
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The Cosmic Gobsmack: Me and Mr. C - My gut started bothering me a week or so before the last GenCon. I had a previously set appointment for Aug. 21st and told my Family Dr., who recommended a...9 years ago
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Bob and Thor track and find three deer in one day - Thor von Moosbach-Zuzelek, a brother to our Tuesday and Darren Doran's Theo, has had a great tracking season so far. He helped hunters to recover their de...
9 years ago -
Thrantrix the Ineffable Contest - Thrantrix the Ineffable, that lovable whirling-ball-of-snakes Chaos Godling, has demanded that her worship grow. So we’re running a contest! We want to see...9 years ago
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Why I No Longer Buy Under Armour Products - This post is an opinion piece, done to express my disappointment in Under Armour as a company and make clear my intention to stop purchasing any of their...9 years ago
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Cardinal Spider--Montporte Dungeon Campaign Critter - *CARDINAL SPIDER* Cardinal spiders travel in small roving bands made up of 2-8 males and 2-4 females. The males are the smaller of two (about 60 pounds in...
9 years ago -
Godbound: Freedom of Strife - • The plan was for the group to Liberation, sneak into the prison, and then get out with Strife. Turns out the complication was Hope and Bones. Bones ha...10 years ago
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A short review of every post-apocalyptic novel I've ever read. - The other day I was thinking about post-apocalyptic novels, and how many of them I'd read. So I sat down and created a list of as many of them that I've re...10 years ago
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Adventures on the 7th sea – Campaign specifics Part I - In any rpg campaign there will be "home rules" reflecting The flavor and tone of the campaign, the specific rule changes and, (of course) a Dungeon Master...
10 years ago -
Illyrians of Note: The Demimonde - Just above the ranks of the criminal underworld but falling just short of respectability, there exists a shadowy, ill-defined "half-world" populated by a ...
11 years ago -
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Mark it zero!
Get Carter
About Me
- Uncle Sam
- I am thought to be exiled gentry, a vagabond, a scandalous rogue, a troubadour, armchair tactician, amateur grifter, self taught mechanic, would be author, adventurer, rogue scholar, traveler of strange lands, and an all round near do well.
3 comments:
OH my God. that was funny!
I had to stop for a minute when I got to:
"Beef is meat. Pork is meat. Horses, monkeys, and allegedly Arby's roast beef are meat. Even Rosie O'Donnell's ball sack is meat."
I needed to catch my breath i was laughing so much.
This ones a keeper and I'm stealing it!
Dont thank me. Thank Steve for eating it! :-)
Ewwwwwww!
Funny and Disturbing....
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